Do you have problems with how to understand women? Why are women so complicated?
Why do nice guys always seem to finish last?
Why do women like some guys better than others?
Trying to get a girl to like you; or to understand why a girl you like didn’t like you back can really suck. So can never finding a woman who wants to date you, or understanding why women never seem to mean what they say.
The only thing you certainly DO understand is – women are COMPLICATED.
You meet a woman who seems to like you and tells you you’re a great guy. You see her regularly and start hanging out with her. You really like her so you get up the nerve to ask her for an actual date – and she turns you down.
Why? What did you do wrong? Or what could you have done differently?
Why do the women who genuinely like you never want to date you? Why do you keep ending up in the Friend Zone?
Attraction isn’t a choice, and you know that’s true. If a girl you liked well enough (but who didn’t push your buttons) were to ask you for a date, you would be flattered, but it wouldn’t make you say yes.
What’s Going On?
Just because a girl compliments you and tells you you’re a nice guy, it doesn’t mean that she’s into you. It’s a sad but tough fact of life that girls don’t find men sexually attractive nearly as often as guys do girls. I know that for you guys it sucks, but it’s just the way we’re made.
In fact when you get a real grip on how to understand women, you’ll hear warning bells when a girl tells you you’re a nice guy. You’ll know that although it might be her way of telling you she likes you, she probably means that she’s never going to get hot and bothered about you.
The way girls communicate is very different from men. Girls are nurturers and carers, and they recoil from saying unpleasant things straight out. Instead they will try to soften the blow by saying something nice, and leave you to work out that the real truth lies in what they’re NOT saying.
I bet that now you’re shaking your head and saying ‘I don’t understand. That’s gibberish’.
The thing is that girls hint at unpleasant truths far more often that saying them outright. Another girl will have no trouble picking up on the hint, and understanding the real meaning in what was said. Unfortunately girls expect men to be able to do the same.
Of course they can’t – and don’t.
So when a girl says ‘You’re a really nice guy’ she’s trying to let you down gently, because the unspoken ending to that sentence is often ‘so I don’t really know why I don’t fancy you – but I just don’t’.
And in case you’re wondering, she really does mean the bit about thinking you’re a nice guy. And she hopes it makes you feel a bit better.
Women don’t understand men very well either.
How to Get a Girlfriend
Learning how to understand women means trying to get a view of yourself as you might appear to a girl.
Most guys are remarkably sure that they are pretty terrific – and they can be astonished when girls don’t seem to agree. But you, like everyone else, have your flaws.
A clever guy will learn from his more successful rivals.
So the next time a girl you like chooses to date someone else, don’t just dismiss her as a fool and him as a jerk. Try to look at him more objectively and see what quality he had that fired her sexual imagination.
One mistake inexperienced guys can make is to try too hard. You don’t have to be the coolest dude on the block to make it with girls. In fact, the more of an act you put on, the more likely she is to sense it and be turned off.
It’s important to be yourself – but to make that your BEST self. Make an effort to look good and to keep your social graces up to scratch. That means remembering your manners, being able to contribute to the conversation and showing a genuine interest in her.
A lot of guys are not great talkers. But a man who can hold a great conversation with a woman will never go short of girlfriends.
Accept That Sometimes It Just Won’t Work
Sometimes you have to accept that a vital spark is missing, no matter how well you get on together.
There’s much more to a sexual and romantic connection than mere compatibility. Compatibility makes great friends, but you need chemistry for a relationship.
If you find yourself having the ‘let’s just be friends’ conversation, don’t agree to it unless it’s genuinely what you want. Apart from setting yourself up for inevitable unhappiness, you may also be harming your future dating prospects.
The more you put yourself in the role of friend to a girl, the more natural and instinctive the role becomes and the easier it is to find yourself falling into that role over and over again.
How to Understand Women
Becoming a girl’s friend isn’t the way into her heart, although many men hope that it might be. When you play the part of friend and confidante, you are diminishing your masculinity because you are playing a girl’s role. To attract a woman sexually you need to make her aware of your masculinity; to remind her that she is with a Member of the Opposite Sex.
It’s this consciousness that creates sexual attraction. Make it clear that you are looking for a girlfriend, not another buddy. At the very least, it will remind her of what you are, and it may make her look at you in a new light.
Flirt with her, tease her and make her laugh, but don’t cosy up to her and try to be her friend. Girls don’t fall in love with their friends.